Tag Archives: Blogging

How May I Help?

Voice at the other end of the phone: Good afternoon, Digital Preservation Society, this is Lauren, how may I help you?

Ms Scarlet: Oh, hello, my name is Ms Scarlet, and I was wondering if I could have a grant to preserve my website and blog.

Lauren: Can you give me your website address?

Ms Scarlet: http://www.wonky-words.com

Lauren: One moment please…. [sound of extensive tapping on keyboard]….Hmmmm….I’m not really sure that your website qualifies. I mean, you get points for the traditional WordPress theme, but you’ve tinkered with it haven’t you? You’ve fiddled with the code to get the orange hover colour, I’m sorry, but I don’t think your site is something we would be interested in preserving. If you stripped it back to basics, got rid of the ducks, uploaded some useful content, then maybe we could look at it again.

Ms Scarlet: [sound of extensive sighing and muttering] Whaddooya mean????!! It has plenty of useful content!!! Look at the calligraphy; the bottles; the collages….the calligraphy…the…er… all the other interesting stuff….

Lauren: I’m sorry, but statistically speaking only 10 people are remotely engaging with your website per month, they are the same 10 people each and every month, and there is evidence to suggest that even these 10 are beginning to lose interest. There are a few rogue visitors from Pinterest, but they tend to not hang around; after they’ve looked at the Gold Gallery they click away to something more edifying. At a guess I believe they find your website confusing. There needs to be more original content; you need to finish your projects, and there needs to be some sense of coherence. Have you thought about trying Blogger as a publishing platform for your…er…words? The Digital Preservation Society has recently prioritised giving grants to Blogspot authors. Or perhaps a good fit for you would be writing things down on paper in a private journal away from prying eyes.

Ms Scarlet: [Sobbing extensively] So you’re saying that this is the end of Wonky Words?

Lauren: Please don’t get emotional, Ms Scarlet, you are overdramatising the situation, you have plenty of options available to you. I’m sorry that the Digital Preservation Society couldn’t help you today, please feel free to contact us again when you feel your website meets the criteria for a grant – details can be found on on the Digital Preservation website. Good day to you, Ms Scarlet. [Hangs up]

To be continued….perhaps.

News from the Mantelpiece….

Yes, a new post! How scary is that? What am I thinking? Surely my readers have a month to wait before I pop up again in their blog readers? Blame Jon. And Dinah. More on that later.

Meanwhile, I have news from the mantelpiece [the chair is having a much needed rest, probably sitting somewhere], and it looks something like this:-

my-studio-mantlepiece-2019

Mantelpiece

Oh wait, what is that interesting, yet sophisticated, picture? Oh my goodness! It’s another collage! Let’s take a closer look….

close-up of items-on-mantelpiece-in-calligraphy-studio-uk

Looking closer…

…and look! There is a gilded ‘d’!!

close-up-of-collage-with-gilded-letter-and-modern-script-calligraphy-uk

Shiny d!!

No? Then can I interest you in an orchid? I have kept it alive since March. Remarkable.

Orchid-on-mantlepiece

Still alive!

Well that was exciting wasn’t it?

Anyhow, Jon and Dinah have been talking about blogging and have been saying that only a few of us, in our little niche, post regularly, ie. more than twice a month, so I thought I would try to post more frequently. I know, I have said this before, but I am feeling in the mood to connect more often, AND I’m a collage behind, meaning I have pictures that I haven’t yet posted. I even have a post that I haven’t posted that isn’t related to the aforementioned pictures. So expect more. Especially on Sunday. There may be a coup.

Quack, Quack.

Iknow!! It’s good isn’t it?!!! A couple of people may have noticed that over the last 72hrs I’ve been faffing around with the Wonky Words website. I have explored new templates, fiddled with fonts, and flirted with colour….but, I seem to have found myself, more or less, back where I started. A blog space has got to feel like home, hasn’t it? Somewhere you can plonk yourself down with a nice cup of tea and play with your rubber ducks. Does it matter that my blog header bears little relation to the content on the blog? I think not.

Along with faffing with the header I have tarted up a couple of pages, and trashed stuff that is out of date. So, okay, it’s not the biggest of overhauls, but it’s a start. There will be further faffing in the coming weeks as Wonky Words becomes the new permanent home for Loopy Letters. I cannot be doing with having two blogs. Loopy Letters is hosted on WordPress.org and every time I try to do something with it, like write a blog post, there are all these plug-in updates to deal with… and they usually end up crashing the site. Enough with it.

I am feeling jolly today, despite the rain, so I will finish with a tune…

You’ve got to make your own kind of Blogsite even if nobody else reads along… Soz.

Happy Birthday to Me!!

It is my birthday. I have a buggy head cold sort of bug thing, which is buggy. I am eating cake, so all is well. I think the bug was made worse by this sort of thing….

snow-devon-march-2018-uk

More snow…

When I looked out my window and saw this I thought it was a rather pathetic attempt at snowfall, it was only when I came to walk Sidney that I realised that the snow had been blown off the fields and into the lanes making them impassable by most vehicles – even 4x4s. Do I have pictures of the lanes? Of course I don’t…. you need fingers to take pictures, and my fingers were frozen within two pairs of thick woolly gloves. I’m actually very sad that I don’t have pictures because it was all very dramatic and rather rare for Devon.

Meanwhile, I am concerned that we have lost Mr Mags, I believe this is due to technical issues, so I shall be trying to contact him the old-fashioned way via pen and paper…. I was thinking that I could buy a card that we could all sign and send on to him, obviously this card would start in Devon, UK, then journey to Norfolk…. it would then spend some time in Texas, HERE and HERE before making its way to Canada, then down under to Australia…. [perhaps Dinah could stand over Ms Prinny when she signs it so that it doesn’t get lost] and then finally to Germany. I’d like Mr Mags to know that we are all thinking of him.

Yes, and while I am on the subject of lost things…. shall I see if I can purchase an item of clothing to replace the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts??? Shall I? Just as a temporary measure until the real ones show up…. but it wouldn’t be the same would it? All the legendary stains/smells/curly hairs would be missing.

Right, I must rouse myself to eat more cake….

Blurry Pics and Poo Bags

As promised for this Monday morning I bring you a picture of some cows….

Another-field-in-Devon-uk

Morning Walk

I am not brilliant at photography, and, to be honest, due to the way the light was hitting the screen on my phone I had absolutely no idea how this picture was going to come out, all I could see was black, so I aimed the camera in the general direction of the cows and hoped for the best. Agreed, it may be a little blurry but this is because I had Sid tugging on the end of a lead causing me to wobble and the freshly used poo bag to bounce against my thigh – oh the glamour!
Anyhow, to prove that the cows are in the picture I have a cropped image for your perusal.

cows-in-devon-field-august-2017

Cows

For your interest, my house is behind the tree on the left.

Tomorrow: Incontinence Pads – Who Should Pay??? A nitty-gritty exposure on the horrors of being a resident in a British nursing home.

Once in a Blue Moon

I have decided that in the interests of my ever diminishing blogging tribe that I will blog on a daily basis. Yes, get up off the floor, you read that right. Yes, Ms Scarlet, the blogger who turns up once every three months, waves her knickers in the air, types three lines of nothingness then buggers off into the sunset, is committing to being a daily blogger.

Why? Because I think it was/is the regular bloggers who kept us all going…. bloggers such as The Mistress. I am not saying that I will write anything interesting…. there might be a picture of a cow one day, some udders the next…. maybe a steaming cow pat now and then…. but it will be a blog where there is always something – however silly and irrelevant. Anyhow this is my plan.

I will leave you to ponder this earth shattering, faintly terrifying news and leave you with a tune…. a tune that always makes me think of Mr Coppens.

Empire of the Sun 'We are the People' from Josh Logue on Vimeo.