Oh thank goodness… Mr Devine has written this post for me, which is a summary of the best captions left for the legendary Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts competition, and reads as follows…
So many great captions! I think they’re all fabulous – especially one or two that probably aren’t captions – here are some of my favourites so far (not that my opinion means anything, of course):
Batarde’s “Nice boots and sofa.” – I imagine it said like Worf does, HERE
Norma(n)’s “Why would I want anything from someone who gives enemas to their xmas ornaments before storing them?”
lisleman’s “Scarlet taps into her secret cache of Cognac.”
Maddie’s “This will only be a small prick, I promise.”
Rimpy’s “These damned vape pens are so hard to refill!” (And I LOVE “Dr Scarlet Jinglepants”!)
and Savvy’s “Scarlet, so lithe, winsome, and delicate had to resort to using her hiking boots and dog to avoid sliding off her fabulous furry sofa whilst wearing the World Famous Freaking Green Elf Shorts which are made from the finest polyester velvet!”
You have your work cut out for you, Ms Scarlet. I’m so excited to find out where the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts will end up next!
Well, Mr Devine, the wait is over!!! I am boxing the shorts up as I type [no mean feat], and collecting other bits of British tat treasure from around the house to send on to Mistress Maddie!!!!!!! I might even include a frozen Codfangler!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS MISTRESS MADDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My question is: Does Mistress Maddie ever do small pricks????
*BTW, My favourite Mr Devine caption was:- ‘Desperate for a wee – and using the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts to soak up any unintended leakages – Ms Scarlet applies the final speck of glitter to her artisinal Christmas bauble that she started making six months ago. She should finish the set of six by 2024…’
**AND, even though Mr Devine wrote most of this post I still had to do all the links, and I am very tired now.
Congratulations, Maddie! I can’t wait to see what Pam Demic makes of these… Jx
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I hope she doesn’t make ANYTHING of them.Gods-on-cloud! We can’t have a plethora of things made from grubby green velour!
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Dinah – Lots of mini-me shorts?! They would make a fine pair of dusters. With bells on.
Sx
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I might just send them to Mar-A-Lago
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Mistress Maddie – All I know is that this is a Trump place! Forgive this ignorant Brit!
Sx
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Jon – Same here!!! Those rubber gloves are going to be needed!!
Sx
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Huzzah for the worthy winner, whose entry so perfectly captures the spirit of this blog!
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Mr Batarde – Indeed it does! And speaking of this blog – it keeps throwing me out meaning I have to log in every five minutes – and those on Blogger thought they had problems!
Sx
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Just so you know…Im still howling over Norma’s comment. I have always loved how Norma drops a gem of a comment, runs and leaves me still laughing days later.
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Congratulations, Mistress Maddie! But, I swear, sugar, I can’t imagine a “small prick” in those shorts! xoxo
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Hahaha!! Nor can I, Savvy!!!!
Sx
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Yayyyyyyyyy!!!! Mistress Maddie!!!
I love Maddie’s caption – so concise and funny (although, like you, I can’t imagine Maddie saying it in real life). So, the ‘Shorts will be going back to Pennsylvania – I’d better get on with the Map (which rather implies that I know what I’m going to do and have started it. I don’t, and I haven’t. Yet).
P.S. As I co-wrote this post, does that mean I don’t have to post something on my own blog until next week, now?
P.P.S. I agree – doing links is EXHAUSTING!
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Mr Devine – I was kind of taken by the notion that Maddie would never say this in real life, hence it was funny on several levels!! And I also can’t wait to see what she’ll do with them.
As for your post re the shorts you have permission to use my patented cut and paste method 😊. I am nice like that.
Sx
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Sadly, both of you are wrong. I have absolutely no filter. When my two friends were just complaining of getting their boosters, I asked them in a full room,” You guys never had issue with taking a small prick before.”
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Mistress Maddie – I need you by my side if there is another booster – my jabs have all been painful, I’m sure you could take my mind off it and make it a more enjoyable experience!
Sx
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If I only had a dollar for everything I heard that…….
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I was laughing so much at all the entries I forgot to say how much fun these little contests are. So much better than a piss-up in Downing Street. Well done, you daft lot!
And now, I’d better get my own quilled dipped and write a revealing post….
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Aww… thank you, Dinah! What happened to the ‘Did I win Yet’ event? We were supposed to do that every year – I must see what I did last time and bring it to the forefront of our collective mind.
Sx
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Congratulations to Maddie, and good job to everyone else who captioned or just commented. And of course, a HUGE “Thank you!” to Ms. Scarlet for a fun competition, and for keeping the legend of the Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts alive. We’re making history!
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Rimpy – I hope the shorts will now go forth and prosper for at least another ten years!
Yeah, it all went better than I expected.
Sx
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P.S.: Who IS that in the green Y-fronts? Asking for a friend.
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That, dear Rimpy, is Maddie: The Mistress Borghese herself!
It seems that Jon of Redcar may have some competition…
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Maddie is modeling The Freakin’ Green Boxer Briefs, Rimpy.
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OMG!!!!! I can’t believe I have won this treasure and honor! I say that why trying to keep a straight face, mind you. Who knew my mouth would ever win me anything? You have no idea how beyond happy it will be to receive these things in a pandemic. I just hope when it’s my turn to do the picture, nothing hangs out the bottom. Is Mr DeVice’s scent still in them I wonder?
I shall email you dear Scarlet…and make sure those things are sanitized
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Maddie – Sorry to disappoint, but IDV’s parts have never touched these Shorts. The ones currently in play are clones of the originals, which, when last seen, were still in the clutches of Princess in Australia. And, according to the rules, no cleaning allowed, but take solace in the fact that these bad boys have only been worn by three different people, so far.
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Oh curses….that is right. I had forgotten about the debacle in Australia.
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You are a worthy winner, Mistress Maddie! The first time you get the shorts it is a bit magical, and it is a lot of fun, and it is a little part of blogging history – win them and you’ll never be forgotten in the virtual world!
Sx
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Congratulations, Maddie! And thanks to Miss Scarlet for a fab compo.
I think that Mr. DeVice should deliver them in person to Mistress Maddie. A sort of Freakin’ Green Elf Shorts special delivery telegram. With bells on.
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Ms Mistress – Aww, thank you! It was better than I thought it was going to be!
I agree! I will sent the shorts to Mr Devine on my flying bathmat and he can proceed with the delivery! It’ll save me some stamps.
Sx
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I like the way the Mistress thinks.
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i shall have to borrow your bathmat to make the transatlantic crossing as Broom is incapable of such a feat these days…
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This comment was supposed to be in response to The Mistress’s. And begin with a capital I…
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If you’re taking the bathmat, Mr. DeVice, you might as well join Maddie in the bath while you’re there. Wait until Maddie sees your “pink loofah/body mop/nylon netting shower pom pom on a string thingamy.”
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*Makes note to put ‘pink loofah/body mop/nylon netting shower pom pom on a string thingamy’ in Maddie’s FGES parcel.
Sx
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Maybe Mr DeVice, and his “hanging pink pom pom thingy” can be part of my picture. Im sure it’s a nice one. Are you turned off Scarlet by x rated things?
Oh wait, you hang out at the Informanaic what was I thinking?
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I put a “pink loofah/body mop/nylon netting shower pom pom on a string thingamy” in Prinny’s FGES parcel and look what happened there…
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Nooooooooooo!! Maybe I will rethink the pom pom thingamy. Maybe a rubber duck would suffice?
Sx
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Whatever happened to Prinny? Jx
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Jon – We don’t know, she just vanished. I don’t think her mother was very well.
Sx
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They do well.
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I rather liked lisleman’s caption, but there you are. Everyone knows these award winners are always a stitch-up. Does the runner-up get a luxury bathmat?
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Nick – I liked all the captions, even the serious non-captions. A bathmat for the runner up? Luxury? Nope, I have something better in mind!
Sx
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I know I’ll sleep better knowing his produce is swaddled in those freaky green bloomers.
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We all will, Norma, we all will.
Sx
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I would sleep better Norma knowing I was in your good hands…
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That was great! Hahaha. Yay, Mistress Maddie!
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Things are popping up all over. good post and links
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You got mail.
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AArgh – I missed the competition, that’ll teach me to stay away for so long. Congratulations to Maddie and Thanks for that delicious pants pic xx
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