I had lost my memory. AGAIN. Appalling. I had forgotten that I was an artistic genius of unparalleled proportions; that I was from a tiny village called Mogwash; and that my most recent artworks were made from vintage ephemera and ripped up books – but worst of all, I’d forgotten that I was the highly intelligent, yet modest author, of the much loved Wonky Words blog.
Months had gone by without me writing so much as a note to the bin men [I often do as I like to explain things]. The notion of writing a blog post felt heavy on my shoulders, and, I’d forgotten how. One voice in my head said: Just slap up some photos. Another said: Rehash a post from 1957. Voice 46 said: You’ll be fine, start typing and something will turn up. Voice 209 started having a row with voice 19 and I couldn’t make sense of what they were saying at all – perhaps something about putting things on chairs? Trampolines?? No idea.
Thankfully, it appeared that during October/November I had completed a couple of collages, and several photographs of these were languishing in my photo file….
I’d also been busy turning my studio into a fairy grotto…
…and observing hedgehogs interacting with fawns….
…and making demons for a Halloween gardening event.
I had obviously been very busy indeed. But something was nagging at me, I had forgotten something important. My knee twitched, and then I remembered….
*To be continued.
*I will set an alarm to remind me.
Yay! First!!
I can’t remember the last time I was first here – if I ever was? Anyway, I am totally expecting that by the time I’ve typed this out someone else will have beaten me to it, in which case: Yay! 17th!!
I think something drew me here – “something important”? I am teetering on the edge of my chair (which I’m not sharing with any books – at the moment, anyway) in anticipation!
Anyway, him that was supposed to be flying out to Afghanistan is rather cute. Although he should lose the cardigan – it’s too big.
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Oh, and I must admit to right-clicking and then embiggening the photo of your fairy grotto in order to see if I could spy the beginnings of some new work of artistic genius (of unparalleled proportions, of course) on your desk in the reflection. Sadly, it did not embiggen enough.
Although, is that a Post-it on the back of your laptop reminding you to set an alarm to remind you to remember the “something important”?
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Mr Devine – That is indeed a Post-it-Note on the back of my laptop. It is a dying laptop, and the power button no longer functions as it ought to, so it mustn’t be pressed, and the lid must never be closed or the world ends. I suppose that is sort of important, so I made a note and stuck it on my laptop.
Sx
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Mr Devine – Those were the days! Of people clamouring to be first, that is.
Something important… what was it?! I’m sure I will remember in time for my next post.
Don’t you think that He Who Is Flying Out shares more than a passing resemblance to Mr Bean?
All my cardigans are too big – I am not going to lose them despite what my admirers might think on the quiet, or not so quiet.
Sx
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And ??!
I will have to look it up in the dictionaire of superstitions this twitching knee.
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Mr Mags – And lo, a blog post was published! It is to be continued, meaning there is hope of another post before the end of December.
Sx
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I am sorry, dearest MsScarlet, but I can not tell more about the “twitching knee”. The HdA of course has a lemma “Knie” / “knee”, but sadly says nothing about a twitching knee. There are recipes what to with the dirt one scraps off the knee etc., but no twitch. “Twithing” or “zucken” is summarised in the article about “jucken” or “itching”, the twitch becomes an itch, sorry. Following the medieval specialised literature (“Zuckungsbücher””) the meaning of body parts’ twitch is described, with the notable exclusion of the knee (!) – it’s cursed.
Sadly I could not reach the work of Hermann DIELS : Beiträge zur Zuckungsliteratur des Okzidents und Orients, Berlin 1909. In the end you will have to grab your own Melampus and read the palomancy (divination by twitches) yourself. Again, sorry that I could not be more helpful.
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Thank you for trying, Mr Mags, perhaps I should walk more often. Apologies if I have already replied to this… I will check. I seem to have lost the plot. Again.
Sx
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It has stopped twitching now, Mr Mags, which is possibly a bad sign in relation to blog posts. I am in a mood – it will last 9 days and take no prisoners.
Sx
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Oh thank heaven it is you!!! I thought maybe for a minute your blog was hijacked sweet cheeks.
And your newest project with vintage photos and quotes is stunning. Shops in New Hope would sell sets of those Im sure. I still need to email you to get your address for my Christmas list, if I remember. I don’t know where my mind is somedays.
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Mistress B – Thank you! l am gearing up for Christmas, my nibs are on standby, my ink is stirred, my glue is warming AND I have a very nice selection of big golden balls!
We will do this! We will exchange seasonal pleasantries via the medium of snail mail!
Sx
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What more does one need than big golden balls?
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Ms Mistress – I know!! And mine are massive!!
Sx
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I only have one voice in my head, apart from my own. It’s equivalent to your 46, which is the reason I write so much when I have nothing to say.
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Z – Voice 46 is the best voice to have! I think it’s me who has nothing to say, not you!!! Have you read my blog?!!!!
Sx
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Fairy grotto? With dinky little twinkles? Doesn;t sound like the fairies I know. Ugly old hags, with a stub o’ power-cut-candle gummed into a Marmite jar.
But yours looks pretty. And CLEAN!!!!!!
See? I’m all bothered now. It’s the fact that I am a bit slack in the blogging business. I suppose I could tackle that…But really, bed is more appealing!
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Dinah – I think I beat you to the slackest Blogger award this month – I think you’ve written two posts to my one post. I really mean to up my game but, as you say, bed is more appealing!
Sx
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I had a vague recollection in my mind of an esoteric calligrapher from Mogwash who used to post ramblings from her inner consciousness. Then Jake from Essex reminded me that this was just a snapshot of my old life, And then he paused… Jx
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Exactement, Jon!!! This is how it is!! I think you should win a prize.
Sx
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Jake? Jake who?? I must have done a Rip van Winkle…
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Dinah – Yes, good question. Who is this Jake person – he is obviously a new character who won’t be properly introduced until 2026.
Sx
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I have just finished a long shift at work, but i’m having difficulty (I have many difficulties) in working out what the fawns are doing with the hedgehogs, or vice versa. Or is “vice” the operative word here, in which case I will trust you to explain the picture sensitively.
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Looby – I think the hedgehogs are giant sized and they are devouring the poor fawn – no more, no less, no vice like grip! I hope this is a sensitive enough explanation? It was for Halloween – no sweet chestnuts were harmed in the making of this demonic photograph.
Sx
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Love the vintage card projects! My fairy balls are bigger, of course, this is America. I strung mine in the living room like a proud cat. At least the menfolk I share this place with seem pleased. Did they think I would threaten to string theirs? If I put all the books I’m technically “in the middle of” right now I’d break the chair.
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Thank you, Melanie! I enjoy the vintage card projects – I should have more coming up soon.
Ah – I have confused you – the lights you see in this post are NOT my balls! I will devote a whole new post to my balls as their size surprised me when they arrived – too big for the tree, so may have to be dangled from the ceiling or carefully arranged in a massive bowl, Mistress Maddie style.
Sx
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It’s been a chaotic few days for me. Confusion on some topic or other was inevitable. I’m glad it was just over your balls though and nothing more serious like forgetting my kid somewhere. Bwhahaha.
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I thought the advice from voice 153 was brilliant. Just follow the instructions and the blog posts will come pouring out ad nauseam. As for voice 97, that’s complete nonsense from start to finish. Follow that and you’ll rush screaming from the house pleading for mercy.
I hope Sandra gets over the sudden shock and can stifle the sobbing. A stiff drink might help.
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Nick – All these voices and so few ears!!! No wonder there is so much muddlement in the Blogosphere.
A stiff drink always helps, though Sandra might benefit from a slap with a wet kipper/large piece of skate/cod fish finger [delete as applicable].
Sx
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Ah. yes, Good Idea . Must write a blog post before I get called “Mr Re-Hash!!”
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Mr Ducks – We can be Mr and Mrs Re-Hash! No harm in a rehash as people have short memories – to be fair I can’t remember writing a third of the posts on this blog!
Sx
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Those spiky things, spray painted gold, would look lovely on the Christmas tree, especially for those with limited sight.
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Mitzi – Add a bit of glitter and a red ribbon and they’d even look good when wearing shades.
Sx
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My knees regularly twitch, I mean twinge, well it’s basically the same, right? Anyways, I’m wondering what they are trying to remind me of………golden balls? I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a golden ball…….oh, wait, that’s not what you meant
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Kylie – Don’t worry, I’m going to have a post dedicated to Golden Balls in time for Christmas! They will be Golden Balls of the pretty variety though!
Sx
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The forgotten thing wouldn’t by chance be green and short, would it?
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You’re giving the game away, Rimpy!!!! I really ought to get on with the FGES, oughtn’t I?
Sx
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I’ve sent you an email at scarlet(at)wonky-word(dot)com.
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Rimpy – I have replied 😉
Sx
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Well our American eating/shopping holiday has occupied our time around here. My main focus during this holiday is avoiding detection and being assigned some task.
Reading your description of the voices had me wondering if it was Alice from the Looking Glass explaining her trip.
Would it be more proper to call these golden objects, orbs?
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They are definitely balls, Bill, golden balls!
It’s a shopping, noshing festival, isn’t it? We’ve joined in with the shopping, but the powers that be won’t let people have a day off for the noshing – give it 10 years, and the UK will have a version of Thanksgiving!
I need to read The Looking Glass again – thanks for the reminder.
Sx
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It’s always nice to see a demonstration of raw blogging talent from one of my favourite bloggers
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Mr Ducks – Haha!!! Flattery will almost get you as far as a Ferrero Rocher pyramid!!
Sx
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