A Loopy Letter has been sent out and received!!! I can confirm that the postal system in the UK does work!! This letter relates to: The Only Eccentric Artist in the Village… To be fair this doesn’t really help, does it…?
Esther,
Just a quick note to ask you to tell John that I have cleared out his things. The clothes and belongings he left here have been sent to the church for the Summer Bring and Buy Sale. The vicar was grateful, though I think he has nabbed the cashmere jumpers for himself. For the items that nobody wanted, I have ordered a skip, it is on the driveway and contains most of the shed. Perhaps John would like to rescue some bits and pieces? You know, like the vintage gardening implements he is so fond of accumulating for no reason whatsoever. And that cricket bat signed by Shane Warne and Liz Hurley. There are even some things that you might like, for example: the hideous, tacky gold frock that John bought for me for my last birthday, it would suit you, although perhaps it would be too small? Also, I no longer wish to be called Mrs Fitzpatrick, so you are more than welcome to claim this mantle at some future date.
I’ve asked for the skip people to come and collect before the weekend as the neighbours are taking advantage by either using it as a public waste receptacle, or snaffling all the ‘good stuff’, so don’t leave it too long!
Doris
This was not the first Loopy Letter set free to cause confusion and befuddlement. I am still awaiting news of the first – it had a long way to go so perhaps it is lost?
Anyhow…. I have wedding cake to eat…
Anxiously awaiting the post delivery today! Just in case xoxox
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Awww… sorry, Savvy…. your turn will come!
Sx
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No worries, but I forgot to say, “First!” LOL (or in the immortal words of you-know-who, “Did i win yet?”) xoxox
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It’s not hard to be first these days!!!
Sx
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Good for Doris, a little redecorating is never wrong. Is it possible that good old John Fitzpatrick somehow got lost between Rose Cottage and Toad Hall, and stranded in the pub ? Anyway, hope the vicar can use the jumpers, these churches tend to be a bit cold, damp even.
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It never hurts to have a good clear out, Mr Mags! I have a hunch that Mr Fitzpatrick is shacked up at Toad Hall with the comely Esther.
Sx
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Ahh, the shackles of love – as one likes it, I say …
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I think Mr Fitzpatrick liked it all a bit too much…
Sx
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The hideous dress that maybe too small? Ouch. Love it!
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Thank you, Joey!! 🙂
Sx
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Now, THAT is how to write a letter to “Dear John’s” new lover!
And how marvellous to be able to get a skip into the driveway.The driveway here is an exercise in nifty manouvering…
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Thank you, Dinah!
Sounds like you’ll have to make do with a couple of well positioned wheelie bins 🙂
Sx
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Toad Hall, 23rd May
Dear Doris,
I am in receipt of your letter, for which many thanks. Your joined up handwriting does you credit, as does your thoughtfulness. You may rest assured that I shall manage to shoehorn myself into the gold lamé somehow, and therefore perhaps you would be so good as to forward same to Batarde Towers in time for the soirée next week? John mentioned that you were not on the guest list, but no doubt an invitation will be in the post. Mind you, the great hall can only accommodate so many, and one supposes that they don’t have the space to go inviting just anybody.
Affectionately yours,
Esther
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Mr Batarde, I have a message from Doris to Esther….. she says that she’s sure that Esther is more than capable of accommodating the Great Hall singlehandedly, and that the occasion is sure to be a huge squash, so she’ll give it a miss, thank you very much.
Sx
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You’re back en forme madam – Bravo! xxx
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Many thanks, Ms Lulu!
Sx
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The writing is beautiful as always. And the contents made me smile. But what I really want to know now is: What kind of wedding cake did you eat? What flavor and what kind of frosting?
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Thank you, Mr Swings! Did I mention the other week how fond I am of lemon drizzle cake??? This cake has a hint of elderflowers….and there is buttercream…and meringue….
Sx
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Cashmere…I love cashmere. I want first crack next time. I agree with Eros…your handwriting is an art onto itself. I am sending you all my notes to write from now on.
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Thank you, Mistress B!! I would be honoured to write your notes… and if you ever want something written for your wonderful displays then you know where I am!
Sx
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Always a delight to see the latest loopy epistle from Mogwash!
PS: Wedding cake? I thought the mustard lady with George Clooney had scarfed it all down…
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Thank you, Mr Lax!! To be fair I did like the mustard lady’s dress…. even though mustard isn’t my colour. Plus, she looked like she could scarf and get away with it. Sigh. *wipes buttercream from chin*
Sx
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As I have mentioned before I find British (Irish, Australian, too – did the Latin speakers have slang?) slang so wonderful. I still smile recalling when I learned it’s a bin not a trash can. And being collected instead of picked up. Your delightful (should I say brilliant?) post gave me two more. A skip instead of a dumpster. A wheelie bin instead of a wheelbarrow (or a garbage can on wheels?).
So mixing some words around I now have “skip the light fandango” meaning a dance within a dumpster.
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Bill – I often feel like I am dancing in a dumpster!! Pleased to have been of service 🙂
Sx
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Well, you’ve now aroused my curiosity to dizzy heights indeed. Who is this John, why did he leave and why are his things being cleared out? Where is the photo of the hideous gold frock? Should he not be forced to wear the gold frock himself? And above all, is the earth really round or is it in fact flat?
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Nick – I believe the world is round?
Anyhow, John is married to Doris. Doris wrote the letter to Esther who is John’s new girlfriend, hence Doris is chucking John’s stuff in a skip. I hope this makes everything even more obvious… or perhaps I need to use a larger font?
Sx
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Chucked it in a skip. That’s such a beautiful turn of a phrase. God, why wasn’t I born British? So unfair. As far as the letter, to steal from Neil Armstrong, I believe the eagle has landed.
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You are easily pleased, Monsieur Pain!! I will publish Dinah’s letter here at some point. I wanted to publish the follow up to this one first…. I need to get it written first…. though I might be off visiting elderly parents in hospital. They always seem to get themselves admitted during Bank Holiday weekends…. when it’s hot.
Sx
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What a delightfully British Loopy Letter! And one to be read in bright sunshine, so one can make use of the copious shade it throws. I thought the subject matter was a little familiar*, then a click on the “eccentric artist” link brought it all flooding back. Bravo!
I’m looking forward to more Loopy Letters landing – I see one has arrived with ‘Aunt Clementine’ already.
* The chucking out of the gold dress had me a little concerned until I realised that it was lamé and not cardboard…
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As if I would throw your cardboard dress in a skip, Mr Devine?!
I have enjoyed the letters so far, the next one is a follow on from this one…. imagine, if I carry on like this in a year’s time I will only have about 10 regular readers left…..!!!! Oh…..
Ack, it’s got to be done!
Sx
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[unrelated, sorry]
Rumor has it that there’ll be a recording of your very own vuvuzela pretty soon.
May we stay tuned ?
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Ha! Oh yes! Thank you for reminding me… I’ll dig it out for the World Cup!
Sx
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